120 Heal people the easy only way [11 Jun 2021]
When you have seen the face of god,
you drop the misconceptions.
To this humanist, metaphorically seeing
the face of God means awaking to human worth. Article 52 defined godhood as a future state of
those who are now humans. I value you and me with a confidence
that doubters cannot shake. We have unlimited progress in us. To
belittle others is to expose lack of self-respect. Typically, the
dishonest think everyone else is as big a crook as they are-ditto
for thinking everyone else does not want to work.
Discernment
We are not so naive as to believe that
nobody does anything wrong. On the other hand, we recover from
wrong things we do and go on making progress. With that mindset,
we expect the same of others. Article 61
explained that we become what we eat: if our minds feed on
positive thoughts, we carry the positive outlook praised in
article 32. Article 33
contained the story of the axe that comes down where you are
looking. Article 115 applied the principle
to white-water rafting where you look toward safety because if
you look at the rocks you will wind up on the rocks.
Consistent with the above principle, we should dispense with the
concepts of sin and guilt. We do not become what we want to be by
dwelling on what we were or should not be. We do not stare at the
rocks. Let me use toilet training as a metaphor. By the time we
reach university, toilet training is so far in the past that it
is out of our consciousness. Our minds are saturated with the
improvements we are making at our higher state of learning.
Occasionally I felt that a professor was viewing my stupid
questions as he might view diaper changing, but that feeling
passed. My school memories are filled with the teachers who
regarded me with dignity and accepted me for the educated
individual I was becoming.
Religious emphasis on sin and guilt holds its captives in the
diaper changing phase. It never lets go of the negative outlook,
forever crippling growth of a positive mindset. We all need the
principle of forgiveness as we replace failures with successes,
but it is counterproductive to ritualize forgiveness
repetitively. That characterizes dependence. Once we learn, we
abandon the diapers and move on to more sophisticated stages of
development. That characterizes independent creation. At
university nobody thought me guilty for not knowing calculus when
I arrived. The school was equipped to take care of the
deficiency, and I was never labelled a sinner. (I came from a
small rural high school and had to take pre-calculus and calculus
simultaneously. It worked out smoothly and I received my physics
degree with general honors.)
Tolerance
The university experience of tolerance
for me made it easy for me to relate to people who have not yet
learned. Those who do not know calculus are not stupid (sinners).
They are doing other things with their intelligence. Those who
entertain foreign-to-me political views are not robot slaves of
bad "isms." They have merely developed using different
tools from mine. Society accommodates all the viewpoints so long
as we craft our behaviors with understanding. People who condemn
others as "stupid" or "sinners" are acting
out their own self-doubts based on labelling themselves
"sinners" and unhappiness is passed on. Fortunately,
that can be replaced as we share happy outlook instead. We do not
dwell on negatives in ourselves or others.
This is the principle of seeing the Paul inside every Saul
(applied to self, also). Being liberated from the guilt and sin
mentality is being ready to live positively and to deal with
other people constructively. We focus on the coming diploma, not
the past diaper changes. To me future godhood is logical because
I know intimately the love in my own heart. Having seen that, I
cannot be distracted from according to all people the same value.
That is the unshakable face of god. It introduces the new world I
am espousing.
Motivation
Negative self-evaluations lead to
regarding people as muttonheads who need to be bribed and
coerced. Money and power take priority and choice is minimized on
the premise that people will not choose to be constructive.
People are herded like cattle.
Knowing myself, I cannot characterize anyone in that manner. When
depression has wiped out my measurable output, I have pursued
analysis and encouraging associations that could overcome the
logjam. Improvement required effort and patience. It was always
worth the investment. Evaluating myself spilled over to
evaluating my expectations of others. Even if they do not
demonstrate it, they share my need for self-actualization, that
is, for meaning. Human motivation does not lie in external
rewards. Effective motivation is healthy realization of self. I
cannot condemn or ignore those who have not yet achieved it. They
need time and help, not coercion. In the timeline of eternal
progression, there will be circumstances that lead to
improvement. Let us endure long enough for that! Happiness is
hopeful!
The article picture is based on Maslow's work which is no
longer the primary reference for motivation. My article 27 takes a much different approach.
Nevertheless, this public domain picture is sufficient to
illustrate the importance of finding meaning in what we do. I
submit that people do work harder for meaning than they do for
money. Society does well to recognize that fact by organizing
work meaningfully. Outrageous income inequality is both harmful
and unnecessary.
Correct response
Years ago, I composed the slogan "We
love bullies; it is the love that heals them." The play on
words shocks some people, but on second reading almost everyone
understands what I am teaching. To counter hatred and
destruction, we first figure out how unwanted situations
occurred. Typically, someone was not loved in the right way at
the right time. Instead of applying brute force (such as
punishing or retaliating), we think through the elements
necessary for healing.
Patience
There is no simple deed-for-deed
reciprocity in returning good for evil. A perpetrator usually has
harbored festering hard feelings until they are out of proportion
and difficult, possibly painful, to cure. In no case does it ever
mean that the "evildoer" should deliberately be harmed.
Hurting people hurt people. Perpetrators have been injured.
Adding to their injuries is illogical. Sensitivity demands better
of us. Our effect on the bullies around us will not be their
condemnation. It will be their healing.
Remedial work is by nature difficult. Fortunately, the serious
work of treating people with love is a lighter burden than
defending against and combating hostility. If we retaliate with
punishment and cause suffering to those already suffering, we are
counterproductive, the pain is increased, and the effort fails.
There is never enough brute force to establish peace.
Consistently loving is the easy way to make the world better.
We are always choosing by degrees whether to be constructive or
destructive. Little random acts of kindness are less dramatic
than heroic magnanimity in the face of a tantrum. Nevertheless,
they add up to the difference between cooperation and rebellion,
connubial bliss and divorce, reliability and alcoholism. In
judging the derelict human being harshly, we are overlooking
volumes of missed opportunities.
Summary
The Golden Rule expresses today's
message. I have so much faith in mankind because I know myself.
Built on that foundation, my strength is entirely devoted to the
whole ahead of myself. My readers are capable of the same
understanding. The new world is already within us, seeking to be
actualized. It is the meaning I attach to the metaphor of the
face of god. It reassures us we can afford to be nice to each
other. I hope it is persuasive.
Being For Others Blog copyright © 2021 Kent Busse
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